Dope Peddlers and Car Thieves Appreciate Police

Dear Editor,

Have your heard the latest?

The Organization of Dope Peddlers and Car Thieves, a very elite group on St. John, is seeking donations to purchase an engraved trophy.

The trophy will be presented, to express the group’s appreciation, to the person who came up with the great idea for all police cars to constantly display a flashing blue light during hours of darkness.

It is my understanding that the organization’s membership has increased significantly since the inception of this idea.

The trophy, a dunce cap illuminated by a flashing blue light, will be presented during the group’s annual masquerade ball (masks are mandatory).

Those wishing to make donations can do so after dark at any street corner in Cruz Bay, unless of course, there’s a blue light flashing.

Wally Leopold
Lovango Cay